Sunday, March 3, 2013

God Shaped Hole

I believe we were all born with a God-shaped hole in our hearts.  We try to fill that hole with various things, to no avail.  For me, it was sex, partying, and alcohol.  I thrived off of attention from men.  If I wasn't in a relationship, sexual or otherwise, I was looking for one.  I was the stereotypical girl with "daddy issues."

My dad cheated on my mom during some of my most important formative years when a young girl needs her dad the most....my preteens.  It devastated my mom, who had based her whole life value on her family: her husband and kids.  That occurrence shaped the young woman I would become and led me to a life in my teens and twenties seeking male attention.  Then, after having sex with my first serious boyfriend in high school, I saw sex as a barometer of love.  If a man would have sex with me, I was worth something.  Not surprisingly, this did not satisfy the hunger for love that I was trying to fulfill.  My God-shaped hole stayed empty.

It wasn't until a year and a half ago, right after I turned 30, that I finally turned to God.  Since then, my life has a new fulfillment that I never thought possible.  Having God as my main man is better than any relationship or sexual encounter that I can think of.  HE is all that I need.

Who knows, maybe someday God will send me a prince charming who has reverence for the Lord and walks beside me on my path with Jesus.....but for now, I am complete simply by loving Jesus and turning to my Heavenly Father with all of my "daddy issues," or any other problem I have.  He is the love of my life!!

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